Any encouraging words for moms who are breast feeding?

Yes I would just  let them know that the first few days are the hardest….try to relax and enjoy it. No matter what you are more than equipped to  care for your baby. YOU,  you are everything your baby needs.

Try not to focus too much on how much you are pumping in the beginning or every drop, every diaper, every cry or how long the baby sleeps in between feeds. Every cry does not mean the baby is hungry.

Well fed babies still lose weight…some weight loss is normal. Jaundice does not mean you are doing something wrong. All babies have jaundice the majority will resolve without retreatment.

Lastly try to enjoy the process… your baby can sense your anxiety . Take care of yourself…hydrate and sleep when the baby sleeps if you can!

 

 

Any encouraging words for moms who are struggling with breastfeeding?

Yes similar to above. I would remind mothers that the beginning is the hardest…especially those first 2 to 5 days and that it’s okay to ask for help and support. Use your partner for support. Ask for lactation support if needed. Hydrate. Rest. Remember that breastfeeding is not pass or fail…try to enjoy the journey and the process.

EXHALE. Relish in the time with your baby…the bonding which includes breastfeeding…but it is not the sum total of the breastfeeding experience.

 

Any encouraging words for moms who cannot breastfeed?

Yes…these mothers in particular have a very near and dear and place in my heart! It’s interesting how the pendulum has changed in the U.S. We’ve gone from a field that actively supported the formula industry in the hospital to one that has demanded breastfeeding friendly hospitals, nurseries,  workspaces to the point that mother’s who chose not to breast feed or mothers who are unable to breastfeed are ostracized.

There are mothers who will not be able to breastfeed due to their medical  conditions or their medications. There are mothers who will not be able to breast feed due to the infant’s medical conditions or even physical challenges with the mother’s breast tissue. There are mother’s because of their work situation are unable to continue to breastfeed or pump. It is okay. It is not the end of the world.

Yes we have good data to show that infant’s who are exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months will have less gastrointestinal, respiratory, and ear infections. But if you are unable to breastfeed it does not necessarily mean that your baby will be sick. And if you baby does become sick it does not meant that your pediatrician will not be able to help your baby.

The fact is that there are babies and mothers who simply cannot or will not breast feed and we should still support the mother and the baby with respect to their feeding choices. Mothering, parenting is hard enough without shaming mothers. Do I dream of a world where every baby and mother is able to experience breastfeeding. Yes I do. But I live in reality…and as a provider my job is to help the mother to be an informed decision maker and to help the baby to have the best outcome in the context of reasonable choices.

 

As a neonatologist who works in hospice, what would you say to a mom who just lost their baby, but was pumping or breast feeding?  Any words of love, hope support or strength?

Thank you so much for asking this question. Breastmilk supply is a huge part of our support programs for families whose babies may require neonatal hospice and even for mothers who experience still birth. For mothers who experience still birth or loss shortly after birth…the grief is additionally complicated by the fact that their body will still go through the changes of pregnancy which includes making breast milk.

We have special brochures and handouts that help mothers to process their options. Some mother will decide to not pump and are given resources for drying up their milk supply. However, some mothers will choose to pump and donate their breast milks a  form of legacy building or memory making for their baby. For mothers whose infants have conditions that require hospice but have well established breast milk supply the options are similar. We discuss ways to gradually decrease breast milk production by minimizing stimulation if it is their desire to stop.

For other mothers who are interested in donated breast milk we provide options to participate in that process. There is no right or wrong decision…the mother always knows what will work best during her time of bereavement. Neonatal Hospice is such a sacred field and I’m privileged to support mother’s in this journey. I know that we will not be able to save every baby…but if we can save the human spirit…honor the life for the time the life is here…that is the best we can do. I try to let mother’s know that their baby knew their love…and at the end of the day that’s all that really matters.

 

 As always  Dr. Terri can be contacted at